A few days after Christmas my girlfriend came to visit me. I know you could go to her blog and find pictures, but I’ll save you the trouble and just show you one. I’ll pick one that accentuates her natural beauty and sophistication.
Anyway, after her stay I borrowed my grandpa’s truck and took her back down to San Antonio. It was a nice trip down. We joked, ate crappy food, reminisced, and eventually got to San Antonio. I met some friends and family of hers and if my first impressions proved accurate, they are very warm and kind people.
Well, after being given two egg sandwiches and cookies I was off on the lonely trip back up to Oklahoma. I felt like I could be a trucker. I actually really enjoy driving. I find it calming. Back in college I used to take very long drives to nowhere when I was frustrated. Then, gas prices got crazy, so walking became my alternative to long drives.
Anyway, during this long solo drive my mind began to wander; as one’s mind tends to do on long trips such as these. Naturally, several subjects became the object of my attention during the 7 and a half (or was it 8?) hour drive.
The one that stands out at the moment is… Waiting.
We spend so much of our lives just waiting. That’s what I feel like I’m doing right now. I’m not moving backward or forward. I’m just waiting. I’m in limbo. I’m in some kind of living purgatory at the moment. I see my goals. I know what I need to do to achieve them. However, the only way to get there is work and… time.
I initially began writing this post as a cynical rant about feeling stagnant and worthless. I was about to write about how all I ever do in life is wait. But suddenly, I got smacked with a huge sack of optimism!
You see, I’m waiting BECAUSE I expect great things to happen. Also, because I’m allowing myself to wait. If I’m feeling stagnant and unmotivated and the like. Well then, I have to do something about that feeling. There’s no reason to feel so dull. Life is filled with possibilities and I’m NOT just waiting.
I’m actively making the things I’m waiting for happen! I’m saving money. I’m learning (albeit slowly) a new language! I’m flexing my artistic muscles. I’m hopefully going to start doing a little improv with a group in OKC. My life doesn’t have to be boring. It doesn’t have to be dull or average. And even if I AM waiting. Who’s to say I can’t make the best of that?? Waiting periods are wonderful! Well, so much for brooding.
I feel good. I’m not just waiting. I am ACTIVELY waiting. If you’re a twenty-something like me (or an any-something really) and you feel like you’re just waiting. Actively wait. Do something helpful or useful to yourself or for someone else. Waiting periods can be a damn good thing.
Actively Waiting… hmm… I smell a new self-help phenom!
– Brandon Holly –